The loss of 26 lives at Sandy Hook school on December 14th is taking me a long time to wrap my mind around. I think we all are having problems understanding it and knowing how to feel, to react. My heart is very broken for all the families who lost someone, especially families who lost their children. This holiday they won’t have their beautiful kids with them, they wont get to see their excited faces Christmas morning, the wonder of the gifts they got. They wont have anymore messy kisses or squeeze hugs. Even typing this has me in tears, and sick to my stomach. We have pray daily for these families but I know that wont take away the loss they feel. I just pray for some peace and comfort, anything to help them through all this.
The 20 kids lost were my daughter’s age. I look at the photos on the net and see my daughter’s face in them. I can’t imagine my life without my kids. I’ve always given my daughter hugs and kisses before she leaves for school, but now I spend even more time with that hug and many “I love you’s” are said.
I’ve talked to her about what happened. I didn’t go into details, I just told her that there was a bad man who came to a school in the States and hurt kids her age and that they had died. I told her that the bad man is gone now. The hard part for me is I don’t like lying to my kids. Yes, she is safe, but we never know when a bad person could come into any school and hurt our precious children (I never thought like that til last week. I thought shootings only happen to High Schools and Universities, but now we know there are sick people out there who don’t mind hurting little kids. Makes me sick!). For now though I do not want her to live in fear. I told her that she should always listen to her teachers and if they tell her to hide and be quiet that she needs to do as they say.
With holiday break coming I’ve been struggling with what to do with my blog. I usually spend 4-6 hours a day working on reviews and writing. But this year I have decided that spending quality time with my kids during the holidays is more important. I will have a few pre-scheduled posts that will go up but I will not be touching my blog for 2 weeks. I know this will effect traffic to my blog but I think my kids are more important. I hope you as the reader will understand. I feel like you’re my family too, but this is a time I need to be with my kids.
Much love to all,